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We conducted the interview at Burt’s opulent ranch in Santa Clara, California. Burt was dressed in a freshly pressed blue leisure suit with two lavender stripes adorning his slacks. Dom, for some reason, was in full chef garb including a checkered chili peppered chef’s hat with a mammoth, cabalistic apron that read, “Pasta La Vista, Baby.” The pristine, stainless steel kitchen was behind us and looked desolate sans a bowl of fresh legumes. Burt and Dom were seated on a cerulean-like, leviathan couch. The carpet was English soldier red and a plaque commemorating Burt’s 1998 Best Supporting Actor nomination was awkwardly set on his prodigious mahogany table. Burt and Dom were both handcuffed by two large steins surfeiting with today’s drink special the Hairy Buffalo.
Sit back and enjoy CelebrityHateList.com first interview.
SHADY T: Thanks for joining us today. Dom, what was your inspiration for the Captain Chaos character in Cannon?
DELUISE: (yelling) You mean CAPTAIN KAAAA-OSSSSSS...SHEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAAA HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HEE SH SSSHHHHHHHHH SH SH SH SH
REYNOLDS: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SHEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HEE SH SSSHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAA
REYNOLDS: Does Dom like doughnuts! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SHEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HEE SH SSSHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAA
DELUISE: You son of a.. SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH SHEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAAA
REYNOLDS: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SHEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HEE SH SSSHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAA
DELUISE: (running around room)Doughnuts, Doughnuts, WHERE? WHERE! SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH SHEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAAA
REYNOLDS: Well, he smelled and acted better than Dom! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
DELUISE: SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SH SH SH SH
SHADY T: Was there a lot of improv on the sets of Cannon and Smokey?
SHADY T: Let's move forward, Was it a struggle working with the orangutan in Cannonball Run II?
SHADY T: Thank you gentlemen. It was a pleasure speaking with you.